Currently, many human beings seem to do not avert their habit because these habits are regularly done for quite long time, for example, one year, 2 years, 4 years, 5 years, 10 years, 20 years and almost full their life. Truly, the basics of creating a habit are pretty simple, but it is made complicated by the obstacles that get in the way. Accordingly, we may get to the obstacles soon, and some solutions for overcoming them. However, initially let us do a quick overview of the relevant basics.
Note that the mechanics of creating a new habit work as example in following stage. First, it may pick a preferably small or habit to stick to every day in place. Second, it may pick a trigger to tie it to do something it may already do every day, for instance, eat breakfast or wake up in the morning. Third, it may set up some kinds of reminder and so it may make us to do not forget to do the habit after being been triggered. Fourth, it may do the habit right after the trigger occurs every day. Fifth, it may ideally have positive feedback for doing the habit and negative feedback for not doing the habit that may reinforce the continued doing of the habit. Sixth, after being been repeated such this awhile, let us say from 4 to 6 weeks, it may become more and more automatically until it may do not need reminders. Indeed, at this point, it may induce a pretty automatic habit and when the trigger occurs, it may automatically lead to have the urge to do the habit.
The first word let us say is automaticity. And we may question how long you have to repeat trigger-habit sequence before it may become fairly automatic relies on a few things. For instance, how consistent you are with the habit versus how many days you miss, how easy the habit is: drinking a glass of water is easy, working out for 30 minutes is hard, how soon after the trigger you may do the habit and should be immediately and how rewarding you find the habit positive feedback. It is noticed that if the habit is struggle, it is harder to become automatic respectively.
Moreover, it should be noted that habits are not like flipping a switch, in another word, it is not like they become automatic after a certain number of repetitions. In addition, it is more like a spectrum, where they become more and more automatic over time. Furthermore, after a month, it is starting to be automatic, and after a few months it should be fairly automatic. Truly right, if you do a habit consistently for years, it is very automatic. Besides, if only creating habits were as simple as this! For some very easy habits, it is almost as simple as the above steps, but for most habits you may want to form, there are things that get in the way. In short, this to say that what should be designed to overcome.
Beyond, other types of habits are also noted that this method is for habits you do once a day and they may be found to be the easiest to form. In general, there are other kinds of habits that you do with different frequencies: multiple times a day, not every day but weekly or twice weekly, only on weekdays or weekends, and irregularly and unpredictably for example, when you go out with friends once in awhile, or get mad someone irritates you. Thus, it may be categorized into the types of habits indeed.
In link with this scene, these are harder to form and accordingly the multiple-times-a-day habits are harder to remember doing all day. Based on this matter, you might not have the energy to keep it up for very many days. By and large, with the less-frequent habits, it often takes forever to do the habit enough times for it to become automatic, or you forget to do them. Let talk bout this matter, another more advanced habit skill is quitting bad habits. In the relevant cases, these are habits you do not want, but it seems to have been doing them for so long that it is hard to break such the trigger-habit bond. Let start with the easy stuff, that is new, positive habits that you’re going to do once a day. For example, if forming a habit is as simple as doing a small habit after a trigger every day, why is not it an easier thing to do? This is because obstacles get in the way. In short, things stop us from simply doing the habit after the trigger so that we may do not repeat the habit enough times for it to become automatic.
Now, we may conclude some of the things that get in the way. First, with resistance/procrastination we may put off doing the habit, skipping it sometimes, because we don’t feel like it, it’s uncomfortable, it’s easier to stick to our latest distractions. This is probably the biggest obstacle. Second, in busyness we may have too much to do today, so we rush off to do all of it (a form of procrastination), or a huge work project has caused us to be overwhelmed, a family crisis has taken all of our time, or we’re traveling and can not do the habit. This actually does not need to be a huge problem, but missing the habit then causes us to have resistance to starting again. Third, of stories in our heads we were telling ourselves stories about our lives, including our habits and everything we have to do, all the time. Sometimes the stories are useful: “I’m going to be great at this habit and it’s going to change my life!” But lots of times the stories are obstacles: “I can’t do this, I suck at habits, I have no discipline, I keep failing, what’s wrong with me?” This causes us resistance and we procrastinate. Fourth, in consistent with ideals/fantasies when we start a new habit and we’re feeling excited about it, we have an ideal or a fantasy about the habit. Perhaps we believe it’s going to change our lives in a positive way, it’s going to give us peace and calm, it’s going to make us productive or fit and healthy. This is not a problem, and is natural … but what happens if the reality doesn’t meet the ideal? Maybe the exercise habit is much harder than we thought, filled with uncertainty and fear. We get discouraged. We then have resistance and we procrastinate.
Furthermore, as you may see, the last three obstacles all result in the first obstacle such as resistance and procrastination. That is because they are all really the same thing, but in different forms. In the end, the real reason we struggle with habits is because we let the stories or ideals in our heads cause resistance for us. And then we procrastinate. So how do we solve this problem of resistance? We will look at that in the next chapter.
Thus, we have identified the top culprit that causes us to struggle with habits: resistance, and the procrastination that results. We have ideals and fantasies about the habit that are not met. We get busy or travel and miss a day or two of the habit. We have stories in our heads that get in the way. Truly, all of these cause resistance and then procrastination. How do we overcome these struggles?
It is noticed that this book is about this very question. there may be found a number of ways to overcome resistance. They are not a “one size fits all” solution, though, so you will have to try them to see what works best for you. Indeed, here are the top ways to overcome resistance and we will get into each in more detail in relation to:
First, one habit looks at a time. Most people have lots of habits they want to change, but it is a mistake to try to do them all at once. Taking on too many habits is a good way to overwhelm yourself (which is a source of resistance). So, let pick one small habit to start with, and give it your complete focus.
Second, this is to follow small steps. Making the habit as small as possible to start out with is my all-time favorite way to overcome resistance. If you only have to meditate for 2 minutes (instead of say, 30) then the resistance drops greatly. Thus, this small steps may be dealt with effective work to get rid of habit.
Third, let to be deeper motivation. If you have a really strong reason for wanting to do the habit, you will overcome resistance. Lower the resistance and increase the motivation. Really, deeper motivation may be induced to mitigate lower the resistance and increase the motivation in place.
Fourth, try to fully commit this matter. In general, lots of people just get started with a habit without a full commitment. Accordingly, this should be recommended deepening your commitment so that you do not back out when resistance comes up. So, the commitment may be important for all of us to change habits respectively.
Fifth, look at the clue with accountability. Similarly, if you are held accountable by others, you are more likely to keep doing the habit even when you face resistance. Indeed, the accountability may play crucial role in builidng yourselves rather than held accountable by the others.
Sixth, Turn to scene of facing the resistance with mindfulness. This is a mindfulness method for working with resistance that we will talk about in a later of the other contents. In short, the mindfulness may bring us to deal with steps of some solutions.
Seventh, let be just getting started. In such this method, we do not worry something about doing the entire habit, we just focus on the moment of starting. For example, instead of thinking about the habit of running, you focus on the habit of getting your running shoes on and getting out the door. Thus, the moment of starting should be reflected into the entire habit and getting out the door.
Eighth, do not rely on “feeling like it”. That is, this is a trick there may be learned that works wonders for resistance and so instead of skipping the habit because there may have to “don’t feel like it”. There may just do it because that is the plan. As alternatively, the idea is that our use of “feeling like it” as a reason to do something or not do something is flawed. Instead, we should make a plan beforehand and just do it.
Ninth, do not miss two days in a row. Truly, it is easy to miss a day of doing the habit for various reasons, but it is not the end of the world. Just start again the next day. However, if you miss a second day, you become much less likely to continue. And if you miss a third, it is pretty unlikely you will start again (unless you use some of the ideas below). Indeed, it may help to have a rule that you will not miss two days in a row, no matter what.
Tenth, let be getting through the Dip. Note that it is found the second or third week of a new habit can be somewhat of a slump for many people. This is to call it the Dip. In this case, you often start a habit with some enthusiasm, but that energy can run out after a couple of weeks. At last, it is a critical point for most people, and you have to find a way to get re-motivated and make it through the Dip.
Eleventh, let deal with journaling and reflecting. For instance, one of the best tools for sticking with a habit is journaling every day, or at least finding another way of reflecting on how it is going. This is because if there is some resistance coming up, some obstacle getting in the way, if you journal or reflect on it, you are less likely to give in to it without thinking. You can see the resistance and find a potential solution. In short, you can reflect on whether your solutions are working and adjust if needed.
Twelfth, let deal with restarting and re-motivating. In general, everyone misses a day of doing their habit sometimes. There has never met a person who was perfect at doing every single habit they attempted to form. Instead, the successful habit creators are not the ones who are perfect, but the ones who learn to restart when they slip up. In this matter, the ones who learn to re-motivate themselves when they feel disappointed or hit a slump.
Thirteenth, let come to be changing your identity. As reflect in following and in place, you can change how you see yourself. If you see yourself as someone who is bad at exercise, for example, this can get in the way of forming the exercise habit. Thus, you can try changing your identity, to someone who loves exercise. More on this later, but it can be surprisingly effective.
Fourteenth, set to have being completely present. That is, if you allow yourself to be completely present with the habit as you do it, it can be a form of meditation. In this way, it can actually be a bit of a stress relief from our busy, chaotic days. Your new habit can be a rewarding activity if you focus on enjoying each minute of doing it. And you can mindfully see resistance and work with it as it arises.
Therefore, this might seem like a lot of ideas to try out, but should not do worry, you do not have to do them all. Nor do you have to do them all at once. Explore each one in turn, and see what works best for you. With this substance of following explanation, you have to make strong to do it with commitment and then let try to follow the other contents so that it may look for the best solution to complete habit that usually is difficult for all of us to change and move it from what has been done quite long time indeed. Finally, habit may get rid of your inspiration when the commitment comes to objective and goal. This article from Leo Babauta, Habit Guide Book under uncopyrighted.